CRICKET BYTES- Just For Fun

The recent media hype about the waning popularity of tests and ODIs in India has irked the BCCI. A senior spokesperson today announced that this was absolutely false and as proof, he brought to notice the recent ODI and test match ticket sales in Eden Gardens, Kolkata. “The tickets sold out even before we opened the counter”, he said. That was, apparently, the reason why ticket counters were not opened to the public for these matches.

The recent bill passed in Pakistan which ordered all crows to be shot dead due to an alarming increase in the amount of droppings has been strongly rebuked by the All Pakistan Crow Association. They claim that the national cricket team, on its ongoing tour of Australia, has overtaken them by a fair margin as far as “droppings” were concerned.

IPL teams’ refusal to hire any Pakistani player for the 3^rd edition of the tournament has brought anger and disappointment to many people, the chief amongst them being Mr. Rameez Raja. Mr. Raja was furious about this lack of interest shown by IPL teams towards Pakistani players. “As a staunch act of support for my countrymen I publicly announce that I will be boycotting the 3rd edition of the IPL”, he asserted in a recent press conference. “I will reiterate this fact even more strongly during my commentary stint for the same”, he further added.

In domestic news, the under-22 match between Tamil Nadu and Karnataka saw a majestic innings played by a young TN batsman who was also involved in a bizarre incident during the course of his knock. Having reached his century he suddenly felt in his pockets and brought out a ‘Hot Wheels’ Car and pushed it along the ground towards the bowler. Later when asked the reason behind his behavior he replied shyly that he was “toying with the bowlers” causing our fellow commentator Ravi Shastri to beam happily.

Footnote: Totally inspired by ANAND RAMACHANDRAN, Of CRICINFO Page 2

FROM RIGHT ACROSS THE SKY...

VINNAI THAANDI VARUVAAYA...The interest that this music album has generated even before its release is phenomenal. The hype surrounding the ARR- GVM combination was given even more fuel by the composer himself when he openly stated that he felt at home and peaceful while composing for VTV. So, has the album lived up to the yearning of countless fans who took sarcastic digs at it with status messages such as “Vinnai Thaandi Varuvaaya… Nee Studio Thaandi Varuvaaya?”

Omana Pennae (Benny Dayal, Kalyani menon): The immediate attention catcher in this song is the mesmerizing use of Nadaswaram (has it been digitally modified?). Benny Dayal simply makes his voice flow with the instruments that at times there seems to be no distinguishing factors. Kalyani menon is another surprise package who renders the Malayalam classical bit in the song with awe inspiring beauty of voice. The last minute and a half of this number is sure to take you to your fantasy world where your “Omana” might be waiting for you.

Anbil Avan (Devan, Chinmayi): Chinmayi all the way in this one!! She is inimitable once again and simply eases away through the song. I think the song, at least in some parts like the chorus “Nee vaanavilaaga”, is influenced by Gautam Menon, in whose every movie there is inevitably such a fast, energetic number with a catchy chorus. Devan of ‘Smiyai’ fame makes a comeback with this song and makes full use of this “GOD” given opportunity. The clever use of the famous south Indian song “Aanandam Aanandam” in between suggests that the number is themed on a marriage ceremony.

Mannipaaya (A R Rahman, Shreya Ghoshal): Shreya haunts us with her lilting voice once again. The sadness in this song is easily felt, especially when Rahman starts singing. The number beautifully captures the pangs of guilt and sorrow between troubled lovers. The song will not top the charts for sure, but it might be the perfect foil to some intense visuals which can always be expected from Gautam.

Kannukkul(Naresh iyer): A potpourri of instruments (Violin, Guitar and brilliant percussions) coupled with an Energetic Naresh Iyer makes this number a worthwhile listen. But Rahman has nothing new to offer by way of this song, just plain enjoyable music.

Hosanna (Vijay prakash, Blaaze, Suzanne): The start of this one is a complete camouflage of what the song actually has in store. A slow start by Vijay prakash followed by some soulful humming by Suzanne gives the feel of a magical melody. But what follows is not exactly a melody, but indeed magical. Vijay gets into his usual verve to give a cracking start. Blaaze, of course, ‘hip-hops’ his way to steal the limelight of this sure shot chartbuster. The inspirational traces of Rahman’s Multi-lingual song ‘One Love’ is easily evident in this number, especially the female humming part.

Aaromalae (Alphonse): The innovative genius of a musical prodigy is written all over this number. What can be said except “Wow!!” Hard Rock Music meets Kerala Back Waters and is interspersed with mind stirring chants of Sanskrit Verses. When the chorus “Swasti Swasti Sumuhurtham” starts, just close your eyes, let the music fill your head and feel the hair on your hands raise in acknowledgement of a ‘once in a lifetime’ musician filling your earthly life with heavenly interruptions in the form of his albums. When the song ends you will be in that curious state of exhilaration coupled with disappointment; the former for having listened to a mind boggling number and the latter for the fact that it has come to an end.

VERDICT: When all you faithful Rahman fans listen to his latest offering for the first time, you are sure to have a puzzled expression on your face. There will be a hint of smile when you listen to it for the second time. But, trust me, when you will eventually attempt a third listen (which any faithful Rahman fan is sure to do) you will be ecstatic, for such music does indeed come from right across the sky…Vinnai Thaandi…

HAPPY 'BLUE' YEAR!!!

A bright and blue day heralded the New Year for all, save a few fanatic Indian Cricket lovers like me. The truth of the matter is we have seen too much of 'blue' in the past few months. BCCI is partly to blame for the colour fiasco, but wholly to blame for the appalling schedule of tournaments. Given the rate at which India and Sri lanka have been playing cricket against each other, it will not be long before both teams decide to blindfold themselves and test the extent of familiarity bred into them. You can already feel the lack of zing in the ongoing tri series. Lanka and India are already bored of each other; to them add the 'flash in the pan' Bangladesh and you end up with a perfect lullaby of a tournament. It is no wonder players complain of fatigue. Scheduling of such unwanted tournaments not only create physical fatigue but also mental boredom for them. One can now see the shrewd cricketing acumen of Sachin Tendulkar who opted himself out of this tedium. BCCI should take a cue from him and stop scheduling such redundant tours in the future.

Speaking of the future, Indian Cricketing year getting off to such a dull start in 2010 will in no way dampen the spirits of the cricket crazy nation. Those who, like me, are fed up of watching dark blue vs shining blue can sit back and rub their hands in anticipation of a series which can now be called The Pinnacle . Yes, the top two teams of the world will lock horns in about a month and for the first time in many years none of the two spots belong to Australia. When India and South Africa clash later next month the fever will be back and buzz will start afresh... as for now we shall have to wait patiently for our 'blues' to end.

THIS IS DUE...ADIEU

After 6 months of grueling job-hunts (during which period my posterior stayed put on my desktop chair except when ablutions were in order) this 2009 graduate is finally going to jump into the real world, the real industry and face real challenges to enhance his realistic chances of a real career (the word ‘real’ doesn’t really mean anything real here). The past six months have been a sugar coated pill for me; sweet outside but bitter inside. This page has helped me in reducing that bitter part to an extent. Besides the aforesaid activity of yours truly, updating this page with some frivolity has also been a pastime. It is now time to reduce, if not put an end to, that frivolity; more so because of lack of time than because of lack of ideas. This is bound to have a positive (I hope not a very exuberantly cheerful) effect on the million or so readers of this page (I can feel your eyes rolling with mirth already). It’s time to thank all of you for putting up with my amateurish short stories and impulsive epiphanies. I would particularly like to thank the 16 people who battled the personal odds of boredom and time-waste to follow this page. Some of you might have really been following this page while some might have just stuck their names in the list and forgotten all about it after that. I am very thankful to both of those sections of followers, as I felt a thrill every time I looked to the right of this page and saw the number grow gradually from 1 to 16. I should of course offer my profuse thanks to the guy who opened the world of blogging to me and has since been a constant source of encouragement and support to my attempts at short stories, reviews and blog posts in general. He is none other than one Mr. Hobbes (you will be able to see his comments in almost every post in this page). Thanks a lot mate!!

Finally, I leave you with one more frivolity (for last time’s sake). The last line is especially significant and expresses my gratitude. Cheers and keep visiting now and then…

22 years since I opened my eyes to see light…

It’s taken me all of that time to see what’s right.

For a decade and a half life was candy floss…

When I used to live like I was my own boss.

No struggles, no tension, no decisions to make…

I could dream, I could fly, the moon I could rake.

Then came six years like a bolt from the blue…

Events unfolded, limits crossed, without any clue.

Now as I sit back in realms, wondering if my life’s a trap…

I have no option but to thank you for reading this crap!!!

'CAPITAL' BLUNDER

As a ten year Indian Cricket follower it was only natural that I just about sided with my sister when she shouted that Sri Lanka were cowards and didn't want to lose the game so they walked off. But I hadn't seen the 23.3 overs that India had bowled till then (One of those rare occasions I missed the start of an India match). When I did see those overs I had no choice but to agree with Sangakkara and Lanka. For one thing, Sudeep Tyagi looked like Joel Garner. What other testimony do we need than this to come to the conclusion that it is indeed a dangerous pitch.

Apart from all these allegations about ignominious playing conditions and evident injury threats to batsmen what was most dangerous about the pitch was the fact that it gave false hopes to the military medium paced Tyagi. When his good length dollies lifted viciously off the surface, the batsmen were not the only ones surprised. The bowler himself was dumbstruck. You could gauge it from the look on his face. 'Man!! Am I a great bowler or what?' he must have thought before Sangakkara gatecrashed his party. Such false hopes are dangerous for bowlers like Tyagi. His career was at stake and it was a blessing that the match was called off.

Coming to the pitch curator debates, I think the curator must not be sacked. Why? because he was not a curator after all. The original curator, one Mr. Radheshyam, was sacked due to DDCA politics and replaced by a cricket kit manufacturer. Yes you did read that right! Cricket kit manufacturer. What more will a Cricket kit manufacturer know than stitching and sewing? He did exactly that. He sewed up the cracks and patches in the pitch with tufts of grass. He did the job given to him according to his ability. What more do you want?

Coming to what can be done to avoid such fiascos in the future, I, for one, feel that it is high time people with technical knowledge be made curators; not some one-match wonders who played once upon a time for India. Just because you were a cricketer once doesn't make you an expert on pitches. This is the second time such a shame has fallen upon India and BCCI. What answers do they have for this one? Who will be held responsible? What actions will be taken?

Questions are many...where are the answers?

PRO-AUSSIE...GO-AUSSIE...

What is it with Chris Broad and Australia? First of all he is English. Shouldn't he possess that subconscious animosity (often disguised as competitive spirit) against the all conquering Aussies? Of course, exercising that animosity will be quite difficult, being an ICC match referee. But when the perfect opportunity arises where he can literally bully a few Aussie players into submitting themselves to playing gentlemanly cricket, he lets them go scot free.

He happened to be in the hot seat a year ago when an angry young Indian opener 'hot-shouldered' a provoking Aussie fielder. Who got the ban? The Indian. Who was let go with a warning? the Aussie. Now, a year later, he again found himself in a similar seat.

Giant like West Indians with furious pace were quite common in the seventies and eighties. The trend continued into the 90s and 2000s. But the intimidating nature of the eighties pace battery, not only in their play, but also in their on field aggression, was absent in the later host of pacemen. Surprisingly, West Indies found such an aggressor in a lanky spinner- Suleiman Benn. It has always been an unsaid truth that when Aussies find their match in on field aggression, they just refuse to acknowledge it. Their behavior changes for the worse. That was exactly what happened in the just concluded Perth test. 2 hot blooded Australians provoked a 'not so cold blooded' West Indian and got a well deserved reply from him. People can easily understand the shameless nature of Aussies from this recent hearing. They don't mind one bit to plead guilty for their actions. Shrewd as they are, they know that by pleading guilty their charges would be lessened. Poor Benn, who didn't do much wrong except pleading not guilty, learnt another harsh lesson in cricket. When Aussies are involved, you end up with the bigger penalty, whatever the nature of charge be or whoever the actual guilty party is.

Chris Broad, who was in the midst of all this drama, once again proved that he has some speculative Aussie affinity in him which is preventing him from executing stern penalties on the wrong doers. How else would you describe the preposterous variation in punishment? A 2 match ban on the provoked and a light 15% match fee penalty on the provokers (Mitchell Johnson and his buddy Haddin had their cake and also ate it leaving poor Benn with nothing but the crumbs).

Unfortunately that is how the 'modern' Cricketing laws project themselves...Pro-Aussie...Go-Aussie... Ask Gautam Gambhir and Suleiman Benn. They bear testimony to this fact.

‘PAA’B RE…

When the wrinkled eyes of Auro finally close, the lopsided smile still pasted on his face, you are left wondering how many other actors could have carried out this role without even a trace of their inherent styles and screen presence. The ‘PAA’ of Indian Cinema leaves a deep impact on the audience, not as Amitabh Bachchan, but as AURO.

The film starts off with a model MP (You don’t find such MPs in India for sure), Amol Arte (Bachchan Jr.) visiting a school to give away a visionary award. The fact that Auro is a student in that very school is any idiot’s guess and if that idiot manages the guess then he would also be able to guess that Auro would be getting the Visionary award. Thus starts to blossom an unusual friendship between an MP and a 13 year old boy suffering from a rare disease called Progeria which accelerates ageing. But there are unanswered questions in Auro’s life that very much involve Amol. For finding out what those questions are, you have to hit the theatres.

The film is briskly paced with generous sprinkling of cheeky comedy and tongue sharp dialogues that make you sit up and take notice or squirm in your seat to avoid getting noticed. There are phases in the movie which you will absolutely adore and there are phases which you will wish come to an end soon. It’s a mixture of well delivered comedy, theatrical sentiments and confused disruptions in the name of songs.

Coming to the cast and crew, Abhishek and Vidya Balan have carried off their roles with élan. The supporting cast is apt, especially Auro’s friends. The background music is master class from the maestro himself-Ilayaraja. P C Sreeram needs to be lauded for some astoundingly deceptive camera work. His lenses show Auro just as a kid mixing with his own age group. The height factor of Amitabh is expertly disguised in almost all frames except here and there.

The film carries its fair share of glitches- ill placed songs, unwanted flashback, a very very predictable climax which fails to move you. But despite all that if there is a reason for you to watch the film it is surely Amitabh Bachchan’s spell binding portrayal of Auro. He has gone to unimaginable lengths of difficulties for the role, what with 3 hour prosthetic make ups and that ‘Parkinson’s’ style of walking he had to perform throughout the film. His dubbing is brilliant and acting unparalleled. Auro casts a spell on you, makes you love him with all your heart and creates that urge in you to befriend him. If it was not Amitabh, all this would not have happened.

Watch PAA…it’s the least homage you can pay to the PAA of Indian Cinema- Amitabh ‘Auro’ Bachchan.