Sunday, May 16, 2010

CRICKET ROUND UP FOR THE MONTH- Every Pun intended and every insult accurately aimed.

Ending speculation about his indifference towards national duty and disinterest towards cricket, Yuvraj Singh, fresh from a 2 week holiday in the Caribbean, answered a volley of questions from the media. When a reporter asked whether he was pulling his weight in the team, Yuvraj was quick to retort.

“What do you mean pulling my weight? I am pulling more than my weight in the team. Didn’t you hear Kirsten mentioning it recently?” he shot back. When he was reminded that Kirsten was actually complaining that he was overweight, Yuvi was quick to answer. “Overweight? Me? After the amount of running and jogging I do? Have you seen my performances in the Ads for REVITAL? Do you know how many retakes they took for that shot in which I run on the treadmill? Here I am choosing even my Ads carefully so that I do not gain weight and some people start calling me overweight. It’s not fair”, he wined, but suddenly realizing he was no longer in Tequila Joe’s in St. Lucia, he returned to whining.

The disgraced Ex- IPL commissioner Lalit Modi has finally submitted his carefully worded reply to the charges thrust against him. “My reply is 15000 pages long”, a beaming Modi told media persons. When questioned about the necessity of such a long winded reply Modi was quick on his feet.

“You see, Shashank (Manohar) is a very impatient man. Till now he has not read any of the documents or bids related to the IPL (which all of you must know by now). He very rarely reads even the names of the members in the national squad. So, the idea behind this 15000 paged monster is to attack the man on his Achilles heel”, quipped Modi with a mischievous grin.

In news from the Pakistani camp, their captain Afridi has admitted that giving Ajmal the last over was a mistake. “Yes, it was a mistake in hindsight”, he said, biting his fingernails furiously for want of a ball. “But this has once again proved that Pakistan is the only team which can lose a match from any situation. That is also something of an achievement”, he said with a sheepish smile, opening the door for Rameez Raja to find more reasons to praise his national team on foreign television.

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